| You make me feel like I am free again . . |
[08 Nov 2004|10:41pm] |
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Wow. What a day.
So I'm sitting here. Watching my little brother sleep infront of me. Listening to 311's "Love Song". Thinking about that certain someone that has made me be happy. I haven't been this content and peaceful in my life in a while. It's so funny how watching one person rest, and a song and a thought can turn your whole world/day around. I can't even express this feeling. I'm smiling. I'm happy.
He has really changed things, and although we are still just "friends" right now, he's made me happy. He's made the world stop turning.. not for him though, for me to get my head in order.. and to look around and be content. He is almost like a fresh begining to my life. As crazy as it sounds this is how I feel. And wow, it's great. As corny as I sound. I really do think that he's made a change. That needed to be made.
Guys, today was hard. Alot of tough things are going through with friends. But this week has great potential. I think it's going to be great.
Wow. I'm increadibly speachless.
Thanks, thanks to those new people in my life that have made a change..
Thanks to the old ones who are still very much so here..
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| I just died in your arms tonight . . |
[06 Nov 2004|11:13pm] |
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Hey. Long time no talk, Journal.
So this has been a really great weekend! And that, makes me very happy. Last night was wonderful. I went to the game which was great cause we won! . . Then I met up with Elizabeth, and then we met up with Jenica and Rachel (my three favorite people at the moment!)And we all just hung out. I got to spend alot of time with the boy. WHICH is always good. So things were looking pretty good. Then we just hung out and what not. It was great minus a couple bitches, a sixth grader with too much eyeliner on, and fourth graders that kicked bottles at us non-stop.
So then I go home with the Liz, and Marm, Reece, Liz, and I went to DQ. And got Moo-latte's. Yum stuff. Then we went over to Jen's house and had a shindig over there with Rachel, Jen, Liz, and Me. It was a whole lot of fun. Heh, Jen and Rachel said we were the only "cool" freshman. Yay!..
So today me and my mom went outlet shopping. It was fun. I got three shirts from Banana Republic, and an oversized polo from Ralph Lauren! It was fun. Then I went to pick up Lizzy and we went to the movie theater. We met Chad and Matt there and saw Saving Christmas. It was a lot of fun. I love spending time with him. Then me and Liz went straight to the play to do makeup. It was funny having to put makeup on the guys. Then we met up with Jen, Rachel, Forrest, Marcus, and Clint (even though he left) to watch the play. It was pretty good and it was fun. Then I went back to Liz's for a while and then we got online and then my mom came and got me.
I've been having a really good yesterday/today. I'm really happy lately because I've changed some certain things (someones) and it's really been for the better. I was pretty sick of somethings and I just kinda separated myself (in a non-bitchy way). I'm really really content where I am and I've made alot of new friends and that's been really great.
Well I hope this week goes well and fast. It should. I'll be looking foward to Friday 'cause Me Liz Rach and Jen are hanging out again and having a "slumber" party and going to the game! Heh.
Well I'm tired.
Night
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[04 Nov 2004|11:22pm] |
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Hey. I'm boreeed. This will be so incredi-random.
You won't be able to miss me tomorrow at school, I borrowed Pey's Maryville 'M' sweater vest from like the 19-hundreds. Yeah, I'll be cool.
Play-off game tomorrow. I'm excited. I'm staying the night with Lizzy after-wards!! Yay, always SO fun!
Saturday I'm actually going to spend some time with my mom. We haven't done that in a while. She can be really cool. Alot.
Sunday why it's off to the old city with Lizzy and Forrest and Jenica! Yay for us! We're shoppin 'til we drop (which, will be fast for me 'cause I have no money! lol)
My brother has two fish, one looks like it has a brain tumor, we don't know what's wrong with it.
I got my contacts' in today!!! I was proud, first time I ever did it!
Tomorrow at the football game I get to wear a winter hat! I'm so excited. It's going to be cold!
Well, I guess that's all I have for you now.
-Always, Me
P.S.-Right now, all me and my friends aren't mad! (knock's on wood).. So, thats good!
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[03 Nov 2004|09:37am] |
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hoy teehee :) |
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Well, well . . . I don't really feel like updating. I'm in class. I don't really have a lot to say. But as much as alot of people are teling me to give up on this certain someone . . . . there IS something different about the person.. and I believe that things can still work. I was just expecting too much to happen TOO fast, but really I think something can/may develop after a long time. SO, in that case, keep your fingers crossed kiddos! :)
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| Just leave these illusions behind and run with me |
[01 Nov 2004|10:45pm] |
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Well hey kids.
UGH, this seems like it might be a long one. Who knows.
So this weekend I went to John Knox. It was alright. Kinda, I don't know. Just there.
Halloween was okay (sorta). I went to Lizzy's house, and Clint came and got us, and then we went to pick up Jenica. So, we went to that Monterrey restraunt, it was pretty good. We got turqoise blow pops. Special. Then we decided to bombard Target. I got green eye-liner, and turqoise eye-shadow (note: turqoise shows up again!). Then Clint drove us back to Lizzy's. We got ready for our big Halloween night. Jenica taught me some new make-up tricks. Yay. Then Clint drove us to Alli/Deidre/Matt/Amy's neighborhood, and we met up with the trick-or-canners.. We stayed Oh, about ten minutes max. They were pissed when we got there, and pissed that we left (sorry guys) Then me and Lizzy headed for Matt's house.
Matt was a refridgerator for Halloween. Then A bunch of people came over (Amy, Wesley, Marissa, Sarah, Alex, Lones, Caralie, Ian) and then Chad,Sam and Devon came over. We just hung out. I went to Amy's for a while then ended up back at Matthew's. We all just chilled. The night was supposed to be . . Uh? So nice? But it wasn't and I ended up disappointed. Oh well. Then We all went to Amy's and Matt stayed over for 3209483208 hours, then we crashed.
My Halloween in a nutshell: ^^
Yeah, disappointed... Sad/Mad.. Hopeless
Is there hope?
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[01 Nov 2004|09:09am] |
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Okay, so like everyone is pissed at me cause I skipped trick-or-cans.. to go hang out with Chad. So yeah, well all I can say is it's not like you would've been talking to me anyways at trick-or-cans. Honestly. Whatever
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[25 Oct 2004|10:14pm] |
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Well, Well . . . hey there. I'm in a rather venting/?? mood.. SO this entry may or may not offend you, and if it does I'm sorry I'm just in a bad mood or something.. So here it goes, must get some tension out.
I feel increadibly left out by one, very close group of friends. I'm about sick of it. They have no idea what they have done, and they think they can just ignore me and that "its for the best" well you know what I WAS THERE BEFORE your "new" and improved? relationships? I don't know... Sometimes I want to say something, but I know that you will contradict me. I can't see if you just don't feel like telling me the truth, or you want me around and just don't act like it. I don't know what to do? I feel so not wanted? I guess. It's probably true, I'm not wanted with you guys anymore. WOW truth hurts doesn't it? Well I'm just going to keep my mouth shut, and keep aproaching you guys like you wantme to be there but I always feel like under your breath you are like "gah can't she just go away". I'm sorry.. IM ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS here for you guys.. I promise you that.. but, it'd be nice to know that in return you know??
wow okay.. sorry guys i'll probably regret saying that later.. but it's how i feel right now....
i'm sick of lies.. people just tell me how you feel.. SO i'm giving you this ONE (count it, ONE) entry to comment and say ANYTHING you want about me.. and I won't get mad as long as it stays to this ONE entry. Heres another thing, comment and if you so chose, I WILL TELL YOU HONEST TO GOD how i feel/think about you. SO go ahead give it a try. NO getting mad.. I promise I won't get mad for what you say about me, just if you ask me to tell you how I feel about you.. DON'T get mad either.
well this should be interesting. hopefully some of you guys respond.. :)
loves
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[20 Oct 2004|11:13pm] |
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YOU know what? I miss Autumn Ridge Neighborhood. I miss LYNDSAY HAZLEWOOD. ALOT. :( She was my best friend from like k-3rd grade and I miss her. Nobody listens to Michael Jackson like she does, or plays with barbies.. or pretends like they are Harriet the Spy.. Or goes and finds caves in the woods like she does. Haha. I just started talking to her again. But hey all you kids that are reading this that aren't lyndsay hazlewood, don't fear for she will come down here and you too can meet this cool cat..
random entry..
-marie
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[20 Oct 2004|08:31am] |
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Hey kids! I'm sitting here in class (sigh). But other than the whole school thing I'm pretty darn smilely today. Heh. Well I'm really content right now, which is most def. a change from a couple weeks ago, when I felt like dying. I'm content.. Wow that feels good to say that. Change can do you good.
Well Friday I'm pumped get to hang out with Elizabeth. Yay! We're going to the Rebel's game. It should be a lot of fun. I'm sure pumped.
Halloween weekend is approaching on us. I'm really excited about Halloween. If only I could decide what to be. But the whole John Knox thing, I'm not really looking foward to. As awful as that sounds.. I just am not excited. For various reasons of course. But Elizabeth is going so that should be cool, and Tessa's going too..So I'll probably be surpised that I do have fun. But yay for Halloween day! I'm so excited.
Well, I'm going to the beach probably over Christmas break. Yay! Then my mom told me that we're going to our beach house the first week of summer. I'm excited 'cause I'll probably get to take a friend.. And my WHOLE extended family is coming and they are bringing people my age. My mom also said that for all the "kids" my age .. they might rent a separate condo (where our beach house is, there's condos like next door) Cause our beach houe only has 5 bedrooms.. and yeah there's gonna be a lot of people there. Well, I'm sure you guys really wanted to know that..
Weeeell! That's all for now!!
love you livejournal!
-marie
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[18 Oct 2004|08:37am] |
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Hey guys! I'm just siting in computer apps. here. Seems like a long time since an update.. SO, I'll try to fill you in as much as possible/I can remember..
Last week was a good week, it was crazy. And well, exciting? I suppose. Liking somebody new was/is an exciting thing I suppose. But it made the week go by really fast which was good.
Friday I didn't to anything at all. After school I went to American Eagle with my mother, I got a jacket and a sweater. Then we went to Proffit's. It was fun I guess. Just time with the mom and bro, I suppose. So after our Foothill's Mall trip, we just went back home. I didn't go anywhere, infact it was kinda nice just to stay home on a friday. I just sat online and talked to Mr.Matthew. I kind wish I had gone to the game though :(.
Saturday I got up early to go get my hair cut. I got my bangs cut more, and they took two inches of the bottom. Then we went to WestTown Mall, We sorta shopped.. We went to Victoria's Secret.. Then we went to Crabtree and Evelyn/Mori Luggage trying to find a chocalat wallet to match my vera's. BUUUT since they retired chocalat it's really hard to find. (boo). Then we went to eat.. Then we went to Wal-Mart. I hate that store. Alot. SO I was walking back from the bathroom, and this little boy dodged me and this is what happened between us:
*boy (who is like 9) hits marie*
Marie-"Excuse You"
Boy- "Bitch"
Marie- "uh, gah"
I was mad.. Nobody runs into me AND calls me a bitch at WALMART, sheesh. lol. Well then my mom took me over to Carrie's house.
When I got to Carrie's, we (Me, Carrie, Tarani) just sat on the bed then Tarani left. Then me and Care got ready to go over to Matthew's house.
So then we got to Matthew's.. and it was just us (Carrie, Marie, Matthew) for a while. Then Elizabeth got there.. then Chad, then Alex J. We all just hung out for a while, then we decided to go outside and build a fire.. (haha actually chad built it but whatever) so Matthew's dad went and got us marshmallows, hershey bars, and graham crackers. It was fun. I was so cold thouh. Then we all decided to go back inside 'cause the fire was burning our eyes and it was really cold. So back inside we just chilled and listened to Mae, and this really scary band. It was alot of fun :)
Then I went back to Carrie's house.. We just got online and talked to Matt and Chad and to Alex (about fetus?) lol. It was great.
Then the next morning my weekend was ruined 'cause I had to go to confirmation. Gah. Then, I had to usher.. then I had to help my mom set up this congragational meeting stuff.
Then I went home with Deidre, and we went to Zaxby's. That was cool. Then we went on a walk to Alli's to get Deidre's jacket. Haha. Then we went back to church to go to the corn maze. I was in a group with Ben, Deidre, Alli. We were lazy and didn't go throgh the corn maze. We went on the hay ride instead. Ben and Alli picked a rotting pumpkin while me and Deidre just sat on the tractor. Then we got to pick flowers, flowers that died before we got home (go figure).
Well, this has been a really long entry and it's probably been super boring.. I'm sorry lol..
much love kids.. hope you have a good week.. sheesh I hope it goes by fast.
-marie
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| i <3 fetus :) |
[17 Oct 2004|01:36am] |
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fetus fetus fetus!!! |
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you are my fetus, my only fetus.. |
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well today was fun, hung out with matthew, carrie, chad, elizabeth, and alex. wootwoot :) anyway heres a nice convo between me alex and carrie!...
( *fetus fetus fetus* )
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| here I am.. |
[13 Oct 2004|09:39pm] |
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ashlee simpson |
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Things are finally, finally lookin' up...
Hey kiddos! Hope you all had a wonderful day! My day was pretty good. I'm pretty bored right now though.
Hehe, I love it when it's been raining on your parade for a long time and then finally the sun comes out.. and it shines really really bright.
Well this has been random..
<3always-me
I think of you and everythings alright
I used to think i had it good
But now i know that i misunderstood
With you I'd say, I'm better off in every way..
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[12 Oct 2004|08:08pm] |
Here's a taste of homecoming pictures, for those who have been asking...
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[12 Oct 2004|08:56am] |
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Ms.Mcall teaching something.. ? |
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Ah, look in computer apps. again.. sigh. Well yesterday turned out to be a rather nice day for once. I smiled, ( a real one ) so that's always good. cough*hemademesmile*cough.... ANYWAYS..
drama was great yesterday, Kisa, Sara, and I were all smiling and excited and giddy and happy and little fourth grade girls. So fun.
I went to Kay's and Tennis yesterday as always. Fun Fun. Then I went home and HAD TO SPEND MY WHOLE night doing my brother's freakkin Francis Marion project? sheesh. I wrote his paper for him, but it had to be in his handwritting, so I had to say everyword, and it would take him like five minutes to write each word. It was so stressful. Then I wanted to get online. So I did, but I only got to be own for like 30 mintues, because Dad was screaming for me to come upstairs, luckly mommy gets home tonight. :)
Man. I'm crushing like a damn fourth grade girl. It's insane. I'm a freak....
Well, hopefully today goes by just as fast as yesterday did. Maybe it'll be even better.. I hope
love you
marie
**-note_to_you*
Well, I'm so increadibly sorry for some things I've put you through.. Well alot of things. I HAVE not been the best friend I am supposed to be, but.. It was NOT intentional. I'm very very sorry. I need to be consious of the things I say, and show about the past. I promise these things WILL not come up, again.. Unless you want them to or question. You mean alot to me. And, I'm sorry.. Hope you understand/forgive me. Love you much.
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[11 Oct 2004|09:26am] |
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Well look we've approached the first day back to school.I got to see some faces this morning that I didn't get to see over fall break, or tried to forget over fall break. All's well anyways. So here I am, sitting in tech class.. border than normal. Sheeshh, I hope today fly's by.
So my mom is out of town. And my brother is still pretty sick from having his tonsils taken out. Last night his temperature was 103.5 and My dad comes in and asks me what to do. I'm like.. hmmm? My brother also hasn't eaten anything in a week ((count the days kids.. SEVEN)) I hope he'll be alright. My mom comes home tomorrow, she'll know what to do.
Well after talking to one of my friends yesterday, and I got a nice answer, "Not a no, (but also not a yes)" lol. Hopefully things could be good. Liking someone new is so strange. Especially someone totally random.
Well I'm off now
always-marie
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| Happy Halloween.. heh |
[10 Oct 2004|08:20pm] |
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Well, well Fall break is officially over. Good one I must say.
Saturday Deidre and I headed out to the Fall Festival. It was fun stuff. We just walked around and ate at the Gift Garden Cafe.. and SO almost got on tv. Then Deidre came back to my house and spent the night. That was fun. We just talked to Alex and other people online :). Then we went up stairs and read my old journal. Haha. I'm so retarded.
Today I had to usher at church. blaaah. Then I just came home and slept.
Well, I like someone. Yess, finally. It's so scary liking someone new. I hate it, but love it at the same time. Hope it goes well, ( Keyword: hope, which means it probably won't but ohwell haha)
Well, this week will hopefully go by fast. I can't wait til this weekend. I'm looking foward to stuff so that should make it go by fast.
Well this has been useless.. so bye livejournal
em
P.S.:
( _abe questions_ )
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[09 Oct 2004|05:24pm] |
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Score! Only 68 times, come on sonic!.. lol
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| These are the days we'll remember . . |
[08 Oct 2004|11:00pm] |
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Well today was eventful.
At 9:45 (ah!) this morning, I went to the eye doctor. I got contacts. They are most def. taking some time to get used to, but I like them. Haha they're hard for me to take out, I can get my right one out, but my mom has to take my left one.
Then We ate at Aubury's. It was alright. Then we just ran around Knoxville running random errands.
After that, I went to Lizzie's house at 2:00. We just hung out, laughed, and got ready. It was great. Then at 3ish Clint came and picked us up and we had a great time listening to Ashlee in the car. haha. So we parked at Ian's house, and we tried to find paper in the cellar (?) lol, it was way creepy. Then we walked all around Maryville into the Fall Festival. Then we met Jenica, Forrest, Marcus, Hannah, Mikey, and Peyton there. It was alot of fun. They're a fun bunch of kids. We saw like the whole student body of Maryville High there. Then my mom came and got me.
Today was just a content day. I'm really starting to figure out, that these are the days.. these are the days to live it up, and just have fun. I'm really starting to enjoy life, because I look at what people say and do differently. If you do that, it puts a less dramatic touch on everything.
Well tomorrow is an official Marie/Deidre day. Yay, I haven't seen her in forever, or atleast hung out with her. (I did see her today, I take that back).. But anyways were gonna grace the Fall Festival with our presence :). I'm sure we'll end up hanging out with some other random people, and it'll be just great.
I'm really excited for some reason .. I don't know why. I think it's excitement of changing scenery, and moving on. It's exciting, sometimes change can be good.
Well, I'm gonna go. It's nice to be smiling for once. (let's see how long that lasts though, lol)
always-marie
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| A Hand Waving Good-Bye |
[07 Oct 2004|11:36pm] |
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Well, Hey there. Our time with fall break is quickly coming to an end, for tomorrow is Friday. It’s been an okay fall break. I’ve defiantly gotten some time to sort some feelings out, and just sit and think. This vacation from many people was a well needed one. It’s been very nice, I must say for everyone to kind-of sit back, relax.. And drop the high school drama for a week. I’m so over some of the drama we are pushed into. I feel like fall break closed some doors, and opened some new ones. It seems as if we get a fresh start when we start back school on Monday.
Therefore, this entry is dedicated to some opened and closed doors in my life at the moment.
Door #1: (Jay) Well, hey you. First off, thank you for this summer. You made it lively, and great. Second, I’m sorry that things ended for us in that way. I guess while I’ve been thinking, I realized we obviously were not meant for each other. But I still believe we had a great time while we did. Best wishes to you and Alli. I really hope we can be friends though, you are a great guy. Maybe we can sort through our differences and maybe have a functional friendship.
#2: (Alli) - Well haven’t things just been crazy for us. Think in a couple months me and you are going to be sitting and having “pool therapy” and be laughing about this. I hope things will be back to what you would call “normal” soon. Things are a little strange, but I’m sure we can work through this. Sorry for anything he/she/I/we did/said/thought. Hah.
#3 (Ah, doesn’t matter anyways) - I’ve finally realized things will –never- be like they used to be. And I have to say for the longest time in the back of my mind that really bothered me. But now it doesn’t I can finally say with confidence I’m fine with that, I’m over it. I’m glad that we hopefully came out of everything with a friendship, and hopefully that will last. (I also mean that I don’t have those wondering questions in the back of my head...)
#4: (DNH) - Although nothing is really “changing” with our relationship I decided to include you. Gosh, so much to say to you.. First off, thank you so incredibly much for helping me through everything lately. You are such a great friend because I knew I could always count on you to give me your shoulder, or just listen to me. You are honestly my best friend. I have no idea where I’d be right now if I haven’t had you lately (I probably would not be sane). Thanks so much. We’ve made it through so much, and I have faith that we can make it through anything. I’m always always here for you. No matter what happens to either one of us, I’m always going to be there right with you, hope you know that. I love you so much (I don’t tell you that enough, and will probably never tell you enough to express it).. Thanks.
#5: (Carrie) - Hey, I’m glad I got to spend some time with you over break. You are such a fun person to be with. I’m sorry that lately we have had clashing opinions about something, and have lost touch with our friendship. I hope that can change soon. I’m always here if you need someone to talk to. I’m glad we can also just forget our stupid fights that we’ve had and in the past and move on. Thanks carebear! Oh yeah, “It’s a skunk”…
#6: (Ah, another who shall not be mentioned) - This may sound blunt and harsh but this is how I feel. Lately, you’ve made me feel terrible. You make fun of me, and talk about me. You seem to cause a bit more drama in my life. I really don’t enjoy it, and the teasing tends to get on my nerves after a while. You’ve done some things that really hurt my feelings this year, and then tried to redeem yourself. I’m sorry that I’m not trying to be your friend anymore. I just can’t take it right now.. When you decide to cut the making fun of/ripping up my pictures/being mean/talking about me stuff.. Maybe we can start over.
Well, that felt good (well the last one didn’t really). But, I’m glad I got all my feelings out. Well that’s all for this update, hope you all had a great break.
Always-
Marie
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[07 Oct 2004|01:20pm] |
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pro's and con's of breathing- fall out boy |
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Hey kiddos, It's been a while now, hasn't it?
Well fall break has been going pretty well, I suppose. I've had fun but it hasn't been like "OMGAH YAYAYAY!"
Well Monday I went to Foothills with Deidre, it was fun.. I thought we'd get bored because we were going to be stuck there forever, but we managed to get jobs at FYE.. and got free gum. So go us! Love ya DNH :)
Tuesday I went to the mall. I got two shirts and some legwarmers (yeah, I'm stuck in the 80's now).
Then Carrie and I went to Matthew Cavagrotti's house. Chad, Sam, and Aaron came over there too. It was fun we watched Fight Club (ahh, yes!) and ate pizza. We weren't watching the clock so when we did decide to look at the clock it was 1.. And Matt's parents were supposed to take us home, but they had fallen asleep. So we called Mr.Will to come get us. (Thanks for saving us) Then we went back to Carrie's house and stayed online til' 4 (yeah we have a life?)
Then Wednesday we slept pretty late, and just got ready and stuff. Then we picked Lennon up, and went to Arby's then my dad came and got us, and Carrie stayed the night again last night. We had fun :)
I'll update later I suppose.
Love you Livejournal (No, I'm not making fun of Trey?)
-marie
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emmamarie25's journal
